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Lifetime's Sorority Wars "rushes" without a football

Lucy Hale sings and stars in Lifetime's Sorority Wars

Manhood temporarily put in blind trust. Check.

Mind open to writing objective review of full-blown chick flick. Check.

Mind wandering after about five minutes. Check.

Actually it wasn't so bad. Lifetime's Sorority Wars (Saturday, Oct. 17th at 8 p.m. central) sprinkles a few lessons to live by into a pretty entertaining little story about the snippy, snooty Deltas vs. the more down-to-earth but still cute/cool Kappas. Both houses throw some pretty heavy drinking parties, even if the inhabitants seemingly are all under-aged. But hey, it's college, where getting wasted is part of the curriculum.

High-appeal Lucy Hale (Privileged) stars as Katie Parker, whose mom, Lutie (Courtney Thorne-Smith), once was a big-wheel Delta. She of course wants the same for her daughter, whose best friend, Sara Snow (Phoebe Strole), is also in tow.

Lutie's best pal, Summer (Faith Ford), is an even more devout Delta alum whose self-important daughter, Gwen (Amanda Schull), is already sworn in. She considers Katie a prize recruit who only needs to get her nose a little higher in the air. "Don't be shy," she counsels. "What a Delta wants a Delta gets."

Katie's a bit under-impressed, though, particularly with the kind of guys who hang around the Deltas. One of them is Beau (Rob Mayes), who turns out to be not so bad after all. In fact he's kind of charmed after Katie tells him, "Apparently you're majoring in 'sexist ass.' Good luck with that."

The Sorority Wars script can be a bit gamey at times, with "dry hump" and "douche" and "less ass-y" also coming into play. Again, though, this is college, where nobody says "Jiminy Crickets" anymore.

Noble Katie eventually is ostracized and branded "Herpes Girl" for snitching on the Deltas' cheatin' ways. Only the Kappas will have her now, with even Sara going over to the dark side. The dastardly Deltas even sabotage the Kappas' Foam-al party, in which the minimally attired co-ed attendees get blasted while frolicking in a communal bubble bath. Higher education's just the best.

It all eventually comes down to an annual battle for the coveted silver Tri-Crown trophy, which has resided in Delta house for a generation.

The climactic competition, a talent show, has a nice, Glee-ful feel. It's also a vehicle for the inevitable candy-coated reconciliation between mom and Katie, who's got a surprise for her.

Sorority Wars is nicely paced throughout, which makes its thorough predictability go by a little faster. A sizable segment of the population -- those with no interest in Saturday night's televised college football games -- can visit Lifetime's fictional Tate University campus instead. No one wears shoulder pads and the only "dirty rushing" on display is a recruiting violation by Delta.